how did i get here?
i've been married to my husband for 8 years and i haven't been happy for about 5. i love him but i don't like him a lot of the time, which is just awful. it's awful to feel that way, and even worse to put it into words. i don't like how he talks to our kids. i don't like how he always has to have the last word. i don't like that he is always right, and no one can change his mind. i don't like that the "i'm sorrys" always have a "but" after them. we all know those aren't genuine apologies! i don't like that he no longer gives a fuck about his health. like, what? how do you not want to take care of yourself so you can be here for your children? i just don't know what to do so i put a smile on my face and go through the motions. i know i "should" leave but it's truly not that easy. if we split up, things would be horrendous for my sweet bonus daughter. i can't do that to her. in 2 years, she'll be 18...